Impact of Family Harm on Children

Updated: Dec 19, 2022

Before we are born, we start to gather information about our environment that we keep stored forever. This collection of information keeps growing until we die. When children are exposed to family harm, they have very little resources to protect themselves or their future relationships from the impact of the family harm.

Children who grow up in peaceful respectful homes are more likely to repeat the pattern in relationships again and again in their life. Children who grow up with shouting, name calling, assault and uncertainty are more likely to repeat this pattern in relationships again and again.

This is because the experience in childhood is normal for that child- whatever the experience is.

When trauma is accumulated across time, it effects how we think, feel and see the world. Children exposed to family harm have no way of seeing that it is out of the ordinary and it becomes normal to them. An adult who has had a great deal of trauma in childhood can have behaviours that look unhealthy in relationships which may reinforce relationships being unsafe, even when they longed for a loving safe relationship.

Most people can recover from unhealthy behaviours given good quality support and plenty of time to practice new behaviours.

Come in and talk to us if it feels like old family harm is still a problem years after the abuse has stopped.